There was a lot of him and a little penis
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize