this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
