Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
