i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I am available for nakedness
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
