Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
