Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
