She's JV to your varsity
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
