It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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