It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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