Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
