summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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