But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
