I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
