Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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