i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
