My liver just broke up with me...
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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