There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
