I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
we have pet lesbian snakes
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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