i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
