my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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