That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
How external is "for external use only"?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize