It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
