If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
