You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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