Someone shit on the floor
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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