if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
