it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize