Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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