u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Randomize
