Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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