you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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