that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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