I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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