As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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