im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i wish my penis had a tongue
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
