My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Dick very happy bro
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
