Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
