Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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