Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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