Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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