i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize