why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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