Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
