Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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