I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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