the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
