Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
