I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
