PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
