Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Found the puke drawer
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
