a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
