Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
